Freedom

      

"I'm taking my freedom, pulling it off the shelf, putting it on my chain, wearing it 'round my neck." (Jill Scott, Golden)

How many people feel like Jill Scott's song, "Golden", is their theme song? I love that song! In it, Jill expresses the liberating feelings of walking in her freedom. She is wearing her freedom around her neck and putting it a song. She's got joy and is representing God's glory. Wow! As I sing along with the song, I feel the power of the lyrics. "I'm living my life like it's golden!" What a confession! What benefits of living a life of freedom! How is this "Golden Life" possible? How can you walk daily in the freedom that God created you for? You have to learn to find freedom in your individuality, relationship with Christ, and purpose for your life. You have to be free from expectations, excuses, and criticism.

1. Freedom in Individuality

The most important way to walk in freedom is to know who you are. You must be fully aware of self, and then fully be that person that you know you are. There is bondage in conformity, especially when it comes to personality, personal endeavors, and personal pursuits. Be able to express your likes and dislikes, values and views, morals and standards, desires and dreams, plans and goals. In modern vernacular, "Do you!" And in the words of William Shakespeare in "Hamlet": "This above all: to thine ownself be true, And it must follow, as the night the day, Thou canst not then be false to any man." If you are being authentically and transparently you, this is the “you” that you present to others. There is such freedom in being true to yourself. When you are true to yourself, you do not have to put on fronts or airs or wear masks. But you can present your true self to others instead of the watered-down, representative version of you. Presenting your true self to others and walking in your individuality requires introspection, acknowledgment, confidence, and sometimes even courage. When you are your true self instead of being what others would like you to be, you risk rejection, discouragement, alienation, and unpopularity. News alert: THIS IS OKAY. Not everyone is going to like you anyway, whether you are being true to yourself or not. You might as well be your authentic self and attract friends based on who you really are. Walk in the freedom of individuality. Be your true self at all times.

2. Freedom from Expectations

Expectations can be a way of controlling relationships by demanding another person act in a certain way based on your relationship with them. In order to walk in freedom from expectations, you must not only not have unreasonable expectations of others, but you must also not expect to fully meet the expectations of others, as expectations are never 100% fully met. The problem with expectations is that you always have more expectations. Expectations birth expectations and lead to perpetual dissatisfaction, because there is never an end to the expectations. Having expectations of others or trying to meet the expectations of others can be a vicious cycle. When we have expectations of another, especially unreasonable and unexpressed expectations, we expect others to read our minds, and know our desired future or expected outcome or results. We create self-induced disappointment and undue stress and strain on relationships. Likewise, when we try to live up to the expectations others, we seldom do, and we continually disappoint. Walk in freedom from expectations – yours and others. Expect less, accept more.

3. Freedom from Excuses

Anyone who has pledged a fraternity or sorority can quote this or some other variation of Excuses: “Excuses are tools of incompetence, used to build monuments of nothingness, and those who specialize in them seldom accomplish anything.” Nothing is more liberating than taking the excuses out of life. Excuses are limiting to self and others. Excuses are designed to justify behavior or feelings in a way that makes it appear more acceptable or less offensive. Excuses are false reasons that enable you to do something you want to do or avoid something you do not want to do. By their nature, excuses are meant to be cover ups for true behavior, feelings, or intent. Excuses are lies we tell ourselves to avoid dealing with unpleasant truths. Liberate yourself. Do not justify and cover up, but provide explanations, valid reasons, and clarity of thought, feelings, actions, and intent. Eliminate self-limiting excuses like, “I don’t have enough time…”, “I don’t have enough experience...”, “I don’t have enough money….”, and “I don’t have enough energy…”. Walk in freedom from excuses. Be straightforward and truthful with yourself and others. Supply valid reasons and explanations in a clear, concise, honest way.

4. Freedom from Criticism

Many times, people put way too much emphasis on what others think about them. They are concerned about what others think about them, including their behavior, appearance, and lifestyle. Emotions can flare based on the expressed criticism of others. When we respond to criticism, good or bad, we are letting others control our emotional responses. “I am happy if…..” “I am angry if….” I am sad if……” When we let criticism - whether in the form of dissatisfaction, assessment, or critique - control us, we are in bondage and captive to the approval of others. Criticism in and of itself is not necessarily a bad thing. Constructive criticism can be requested, welcomed, and whole-heartedly received. However, when criticism, requested or not, constructive or not, is allowed to impact our emotions, we are not walking freedom from criticism. When we receive criticism, we can assess its validity and act according, making adjustments as needed. However, we should be more concerned about living godly, moral lives, and focus on what God thinks about us rather than what people think about us. Walk in freedom from criticism. Do not let what others deem as wrong or unacceptable (or even right or acceptable) control you.

5. Freedom in Purpose

When you know what God created you to do, you can walk in the freedom of your purpose. You are not boxed into working a job that you don’t want to work or in a field that is of no interest to you. When you walk in freedom of purpose, you are not defined by your family’s or society’s expectations of what you should do or become. When you are pursuing your purpose, you feel valuable, important, and needed, because God created a niche just for you. If you are working at a job or in a position, and asking yourself, “Why am I really here?”, it could be because you are not walking in your purpose. If you feel stuck, boxed in, unmotivated, and limited, you might not be walking in your purpose. Seek God for His purpose for your life, and then take the necessary steps (which is usually a process) to walk in that purpose. Walk in freedom of purpose. Do what God created you to do.

6. Freedom in Christ

If you are a Christian, then you can walk in the freedom of your identity in Christ. You can walk in confidence knowing who you are because of whose you are – a child of God saved by grace. When you walk in the freedom of your identity in Christ, you can walk in the assurance of being the righteousness of God through Christ; redeemed by His blood; free from condemnation; covered by grace; showered with favor; having things worked out for your benefit; the salt of the earth; the light of the world; a temple of the Holy Spirit; and God’s handiwork. When you acknowledge your identity in Christ, you know that you are valued and loved. You do not have to seek validation in and through others. When you walk in the freedom of Christ, you are free to be who God created you to be with confidence. You walk in your uniqueness and purpose, free from expectations, excuses, and criticism.

Come on and sing with me.....

I'm taking my freedom
Pulling it off the shelf
Putting it on my chain
Wearing it 'round my neck
I'm taking my freedom
Putting it in my car
Wherever I choose to go
It will take me far
I'm…
Living my life like it's golden

I'm taking my own freedom
Putting it in my song
Singing loud and strong
Grooving all day long
I'm taking my freedom
Putting it in my stroll
I’ll be high-stepping ya'll
Letting the joy unfold
I'm…
Living my life like it's golden

I'm holding on to my freedom
Can't take it from me
I was born into it and it comes naturally
I'm strumming my own freedom
Playing the God in me
Representing His glory
Hope He's proud of me!
Yeah!

Living my life, like it's golden, golden, golden, golden, golden, golden.


Jacinta M. Gray,
The Couch Coach